Tuesday, July 28, 2015

1429: Quest In Konsumsi

Last time, I wrote some words to You.
A few days after I wrote them, my outlook changed entirely.
Here is a brief recap, regarding my revelation:
(I know it's a little late. Sorry.)

~

NO!!!!
You are nothing. All the power you ever had was a joke and a myth. Were you ever, as a child, terrified of an imaginary dragon in your closet, Or something like that? You were that very kind of imaginary monster. I saw you again, And you looked kind of different. And then I REALLY began to understand. Without the way you looked, you could do nothing. You could influence nothing. No, you were nothing, if not the way I pictured you. If you suddenly changed into a mouse, then I would not be afraid of you in the slightest. It's an unpleasant fact, but I will write it here: The only terrifying thing you ever possessed was your body. And without it, you are as threatening as a paper or a sponge. I guess I can't lie to myself. It's not like you suddenly look terrible, is it? Also you could go on a Miss America campaign and suddenly become (what you never exactly were) a bombshell. It doesn't matter. In fact, that would prove my point even better. Your body is an unpredictable sample of side-winding jelly, And if it can change, if it is fluid, if it is not the god-like rock that I believed it was . . .

well then you basically ARE a mouse to me.

Oh gosh. I just can't even make myself care. I don't want the same things I used to. I am very fond of using analogies, and here is an analogy that I will give you: I am in living in a town that used to be more normal. There were jobs, schools, houses, and every other normal thing. I used to worry about the larger questions, 'Where will I live? What will my job be? Where will I study?' Then a poisonous gas-cloud entered the town and all the food became sterilized. Then the whole food thing became the one & only concern. I really can't make myself care any longer. Do all the old questions even matter at this point? I'm sorry to say it, only they don't really. I have to find what nutrients there are. And if I don't, who knows what will happen. But in the end, everyone's judgments and suspicions can do nothing to upset me. I need only one thing, and I will not stop until I have found it. You can say it's horrible and I might even agree with you.

I don't think you ever dealt with this kind of poisonous gas-cloud though.


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